Whiling away the time

Seems that my life is perpetually motivated by the misfortune of others. Case in point, my father. He's sixty-five and battling cancer. First with in the back of his throat, then his lung and now again (potentially, soon to be diagnosed) his tongue. He complains about the chemo and the effects of it upon him and yet he stills forges onward living, working (in his limited capacity) and trying to maintain the 'life' he's created. Not changing one single thing of it... including the one thing that most sensible people would stop doing at the first signs of cancer... smoking. Yes, that's right, he continues to light up. He believes that the cheap cigars and their saliva mixed 'juice' caused all of this cancer he is now dealing with. I know better than that, don't we all? Apparently the chemo is warping his perception of what is sensible as well as the cancer cells that have infiltrated his body. Sense any sarcasm in my words? Yes? Good! I'd love to take them away from him or even better, see him actually use his good sense to see that he's opening the proverbial door to the cancer cells that are already in his body to turn other perfectly healthy cells the the 'dark side' of their existance and become little killing machines. Life is on the shorter side for him these days... the 'autumn of his days'. He made the statement tonight that solidifies his fate. 'I'm existing these days, I'm not living life.' 'Once we find out what is the deal with this spot on the tongue, I'll decide what to do next'. Fighting this is apparently not the primary goal in his mind if the words '...let it consume me...' are already rolling off his tongue (to his son). In light of all this negativity, I find myself inspired to commit myself to doing all that I can in the life I have to live so that I'm not looking back in my 'autumn' saying 'woulda, coulda, shoulda'. That's simply not acceptable to me. If I'm going down, damn it I'm fighting it with all my life (or I'll take people with me... I'm kidding about that... sounds good though). Life is good for me. It's a never-ending myriad of challenges that each of us must face everyday. Live to win! Believe in yourself that way and it will happen in the physical world of this life lived.