Friends

I am constantly reminded of all my friends and how that circle of friends has evolved over the last couple of years. I have drifted away from the ones that I've known for many years to new ones that aspire and inspire me to cultivate more new friendships with other people. No offense to those in my past but, they have 'settled in' to their lives and families. Meanwhile, I am still, in mentality, that twenty year old guy who just wants to enjoy new encounters with new people (that's why I'm so attracted to younger women... Damn!). The positive sides to this no less include the fact that I'm thirty-six and feeling almost half my age with the experiences of a thirty-six year old. Trust me, it works. Someone once said to me, '...my twenties were turbulent, my thirties were fun and my forties are challenging and not as laid back...'. Admittingly, I have to agree (in light of my self-inflicted 'wounds') it really is a good time in this life. I'm still living the life I had hoped for as a kid. The only obvious shortfall would be someone to enjoy these good (an bad) times with. I'm very particular about that and why shouldn't I be? I want the best as much as 'she' wants it in 'him'. Compromise is an interesting notion but, those compromises need to be affluenced as much as one is able to do so. I think about the subtle 'passing glances' to the 'full on relationships' that I've shared and it's comforting to know that they're still considered friends. Even though one ex-girlfriend, Patty, at one point simply wanted me to be her 'booty call'. Flattering but, back then I was too much in love with her to simply unattach my emotions from her so we could simply fuck. At the time, it was a wise decision to make the clean break of her or else, find myself an emotional wreck years later. I went through enough emotion over her when we did break up. I did that as well with Stephanie. The difference between them is mulit-million miles as far as I'm concerned. Patty wanted to use me. Steph, well, she's a dear friend with me, today. Here and now. She's in Washington state but, I've always know (fourteen years and counting) that she's speaks to me on many different and intriguing levels. She is one of the few friends that have endured the times and has come out on this side with me. If you're reading this and thinking it's corny, Steph, it is. More importantly, it's true (you make it so simply by having read this, my blog). CHEERS!